It’s another rainy weekend here in the Northeast, the third in a row, with a mini snowstorm that blew through yesterday morning leaving spring buds coated in fluffy white flakes. I took full advantage of the invitation to hunker down, enjoying an afternoon nap, a good book, and the chance to deepen my relationship with a new love – an air fryer. Who knew a kitchen gadget could become a good friend 😀.

Yesterday, as I took my time preparing a meal, I had one of those ah-ha moments when I realized that slowing down isn’t really slowing down at all. It’s showing up for life.

As I chopped garlic and onions, something I used to hate to do, I found myself humming a song and blending spices in my mind in anticipation of what I’d add to the pot. My phone was off, the day was commitment-free, and I was lost in the moment which made the experience pleasurable. The voices of pressure and productivity, the ones that drive us to hurry up and get the job done, were silent. And in that silence, it dawned on me that when we constantly push ourselves to go faster than the speed limit, a normal pace feels slow. So we keep our foot on the pedal.

“Don’t just sit there, do something” was the governing message I heard from my father growing up. I have no doubt he heard it from his father, too. As a result, my nervous system became well-versed in the sympathetic rhythm of go, go, go, and this dysregulated state distorted my perception. Going slow felt uncomfortable, even wrong, but in my wisdom years, I’ve discovered the truth: Slow is the speed of pleasure.

Moving at a patient and relaxed pace allows us to enjoy the ride, see the view, and immerse ourselves in the experience. Everything is better when you slow down: cooking, visiting with friends, folding laundry, answering emails, even working out. When you’re relaxed and present, your nervous system slips into a regulated, ventral state, and it’s in this state, you find micro-moments of joy in almost any experience.

So, if you haven’t noticed, I’m smitten with nervous system regulation and its benefits. It’s quickly becoming a powerful tool in my bag of tricks because it’s fundamental to our well-being. To that end, we’ll continue our Zoom gatherings so we can all benefit from our collective wisdom. For example, last week, during our Zoom gathering, we crowdsourced a list of things that dysregulate and regulate the nervous system. It turned out to be a great list I’m compiling to post on my website below the event recording, which is already here.

This week, we’ll meet again to talk about how to deal with people who dysregulate our nervous systems (you might be surprised by what you discover!). Join us this Wednesday (4/16) at 3pm ET (12 noon PT). If you registered for prior Zoom gatherings, you’ll automatically receive a link. If not, you can do so here.

Enjoy a slow week!

Love,

Cheryl

P.S. – Join me for a fun and lively discussion about Self Care in the Wisdom Years at Circles of Wisdom in Methuen, MA, on Thursday, May 1^st at 6:30 pm. You can purchase tickets here.