Every now and then, when I have an afternoon to myself, I enjoy watching an old movie. Yesterday, while scrolling through Netflix, I landed on “The Last Word” starring Shirley MacLaine. The movie is about a retired businesswoman, Harriett Lauler, who is controlling and quite unhappy, facing the end of her life. Wondering about the legacy she’ll leave behind (and wanting to control the narrative), she hires a local newspaper writer to craft an obituary. Tasked with interviewing friends, colleagues, and family, the writer runs into trouble when she discovers that no one has anything nice to say about Harriett. Turns out Harriett has been nasty and difficult most of her adult life, leaving a trail of failed relationships in her wake.

While the movie is cute and predictable, it also explores some of the lessons we might face at the end of our lives. Here are a few takeaways:

~*~ A life is not measured by what we do or what we give, but by who we are. Our accomplishments and gifts may be celebrated for a few days, but the impact we’ve had on the lives of those around us could be felt for decades. How present am I with the people in my life? Am I able to take responsibility for the actions that hurt others? Do I want to be right, or can I choose to be thoughtful and kind?

~*~ It’s never too late to discover and explore who we are beyond the identities formed by years of doing. Connecting with the soul beyond the roles we play gives us the best chance of feeling alive and grateful for even the smallest moments.

~*~ It’s also never too late to revisit the past looking for those places that need to be mended with truth and apologies. The ability to say “I’m sorry” is a skill that repairs damaged bridges.

~*~ That said, some past mistakes can’t be fixed. Some things had to be broken for reasons we’ll never fully understand because they were a necessary part of someone else’s healing journey.

~*~ The most valuable investment we make is in any activity that makes us better people. Books, workshops, therapy, support groups, anything that inspires personal growth, is a wise investment in an authentic, meaningful life.

In the movie, Harriett Lauler was bitter and egotistical until she found love in strangers willing to tell her the truth about how she needed to grow. Facing this truth and acting on it turned her whole life around in just a few short weeks. May we all be fortunate enough to have people like that in our lives.

Toward the end of the film, when Harriett is opening a morning radio show as a newly assigned DJ at the age of 81 (a passion she uncovers during her journey), she gives me a great closing for this blog. Cuing up the first record, she announces:

Please don’t have a nice day.
Have a day that matters.
Have a day that’s true.
Have a day that’s direct.
Have a day that’s honest.
A nice day? No, no.
You’ll be miserable…
Have a day that means something.

Love,

Cheryl